Day 62

Day 62 of the 365 Day Gratitude Challenge.

I broke down and ordered some new phones for the spouse and I. I’ll be grateful when they and our otter boxes get here.

Tonight was horrid weather with this Hermine here and all. It’s been raining and flooding here for days. I am just grateful I made it home safe.



Day 61

Day 61 of the 365 Day Gratitude Challenge. 8/30/16, Tuesday.

The quote pics I find may never pertain to my challenges. They may or may not pertain to a situation I had dealt with, or am dealing with. I just post what I like, and that’s about it. That’s how I express myself. I am grateful for that.

Also, while I didn’t make 10,000 steps for the day, I am grateful I got at least 8,000 and more steps before midnight. And speaking of the middle of the night, it’s time for bed! 🙂


Day 60

Day 60 of the 365 Day Gratuity Challenge. 8/29/16, Monday. 



 I’m grateful I made it to day 60, which means I survived nearly two months doing these challenges. While I’m tired, I keep telling myself it’s important to do. It’s always important to be grateful, be positive, and always have something to look forward to.

I’m still grateful for my fitbit and my wonderful, amazing husband who bought it for me. I’m grateful for the gadget because it’s motivating me to exercise a bit more….something I get lax about because I’m busy running around or editing and such.

Well, I need a few hours of sleep so I can work in the morning. Night! 🙂



Day 52 of the 365 Day Gratitude Challenge.
Day 52
8/21/16, Sunday.

I took some selfies today to post in my blog for Martien and the Blogophilia crew. I’m not quite done with the blog yet as I have to get up early and such.

I had been obsessing and stressing out over old pictures of an old childhood friend that passed away yesterday. I should have posted pics of her, but I will tomorrow probably.

I have been where Jennifer was. I have been there many times in my life. I have wanted to give up so badly. But there is always something that pulls me back from going over the edge. I always think about my loved ones and how will they live if I were to go through with it.

I get my mind right by exercising as much as I can. Granted I took some time off like two weeks or so because I was sick and I was running around, but I was good enough yesterday and today to exercise and that is what I did.

I don’t exercise to rub it in people’s faces. I don’t exercise to get skinny. I exercise to get in my right mind. It gives me the endorphins I need to give me a more positive outlook on life.

I get off track at times mind wise. I’m only human.

I’m grateful for exercise! 🙂



Day 53 of the 365 Day Gratitude Challenge.
Day 53
I got too tired to exercise. Especially knowing I have to be at work by 5:30. I’m hoping to get some exercise when I wake up….I need to make this quick.I realized I’m completely grateful for always finding a way to be pulled back from the edge. It’s so easy to go that route, but I’m in it the long way. I don’t want to take any shortcuts. I think I’m tougher than I give myself credit for.Keep fighting! Never give up!

I’m also grateful for good friends and what’s left of my job for the time being.



Day 54, 8/23/16, Tuesday.
Day 54
This is a selfie I took just moments before I passed out trying to create pics for my 365 Day Gratitude Challenge.

I am grateful for sleep. I know I mentioned this before, but I can’t keep my eyes open any longer.


Day 55 of the 365 Day Gratitude Challenge.
Day 55
I was thinking the worst, but that usually happens when I start getting sick. Today, I was barely alive but no one was able to tell the difference thanks to makeup.

At work, I got a call back from that job. I go tomorrow to get a background check and finger printing done. It looks like I’m going to be an employee there. I’m grateful for surprising moments.

Now, if only I can stop getting a jury summons, everything will be perfect! 🙂

Day 56 of the 365 Day Gratitude Challenge.
Day 56
Today I went for more interviews. I am hopeful something good will eventually happen. I’m grateful for being hopeful.

I only had four hours of sleep and so between shifts, I decided to get some sleep. Two and a half hours later, I was nearly late for work. I got there at the exact time. I’m grateful I made it on time.

Andy is going to get me a fitbit for my birthday on Saturday! I’m grateful for that too!

That’s all I’ve got for today! 🙂

Day 57 of the 365 Day Gratitude Challenge.
Day 57
I’m grateful I was able to take a nap and a zumba class after. That was my first class ever. In class, a member asked me where she’s seen me before. I said I work here, and she was like I know, but I’ve seen you somewhere else. She then asked me if I was an actress. I just smiled and said no.

I’m fading fast. Night all! 🙂

Day 58 of the 365 Day Gratitude Challenge.
Day 58
I am grateful for a loving husband, who doesn’t question me on why I’d rather have a fitbit over jewelry for my birthday. I’ve always been more of a gadget kind of gal as opposed to being a jewelry kind of person.

I am grateful for friends who wished me a happy birthday, though I swear I set my birthday to private. Still, I am grateful and I appreciate all the positive and beautiful birthday wishes.

I am grateful for my son who greeted me this morning with a hug and wished me a happy b’day.

I’m grateful for my little Lassie. She brightens my day always.

I’m lastly grateful for family. I’m grateful for making myself go outside and get out if the house. I can be quite the hermit crab…I try hard not to be that hermit. The struggle is real.


Day 59 of the 365 Day Gratitude Challenge.
Day 59
I am grateful for my fitbit. I’m a little bit obsessed with the app, but don’t know how to add exercise to the mix. I went on a stationary bike earlier today.I am grateful I can now monitor my sleep habits!

Days 43-51

Day 43 of the 365 Day Gratitude Challenge 8/12/16
I had a bit of a rocky start. I woke up. So my day went. I got a call from the job. They want me to come in for drug testing, so that sounds good.

I meant to take more pictures, but I somehow got lazy. All you see is my coin score and this mornings’ sunrise.

I am grateful for cameras built in phones. I’m grateful for successful call backs. I’m grateful things are feeling like they’re turning around. I’m also grateful I’m starting to snap out of my depression a bit.

My world is usually dark, but I usually don’t allow myself to get sucked into the nothingness. Though it does happen every so often. I am only human.


Day 44 of the 365 Day Gratitude Challenge.
This should be more like a very testing challenge as today I got unfriended due to my latest blog post. I write to unleash my dark soul. I am completely different in person. I hide my accent because I don’t like how others tease me on it. I’m a sensitive soul. I can’t help that.

The funny thing is I’ve seen really nasty people comment back and I know I definitely pale in comparison. I can’t dwell on it as it might drive me insane. Though sometimes I wonder if it’s realized the same person you text is the very same person you chat with on the social network sites??? I over think far too much.

I had to work. It was weird working on a Saturday considering I’ve always had those days off. I wonder now what’ll happen with my new job. I believe I’ll be working every other weekend. That’s cool too.

My ac busted when I got home from work. I called the repair man. I had to pay a lot because it’s after hours. I’m grateful I have cool air now.

I’m grateful for life’s lessons, I really am. I guess I’m grateful if someone unfriends me without reason. I guess I didn’t need them in my life. So it’s like they’ve done me a favor. I’m grateful for that too.


Day 45 of the 365 Day Gratitude Challenge.

Well, I can say I’m grateful I made it to day 45 of the challenge! When I do challenges, I’m lucky if I make it the full 30 days. I guess I’m better at making a commitment than I was years ago. I better hush and not say more about that.

Speaking of hush. I think I told too many about the job thing. Andy and my MIL both think that by me saying something, not only will my current job give me a bad review, but they also think I may get fired. I’m nervous enough as is, I can’t believe I have more to add. I’m a big enough over thinker as is…

I have to live in I don’t care mode. Right now, I don’t care is how I’m surviving right now. And I express my feelings freely only because it’s easier to get it out of the way once you let them out.

I’m grateful for being surrounded by good people. I’m grateful for the internet friends I have. I’m grateful for my little dog. I’m grateful for my son and husband. I’m grateful for new opportunities.


Day 46 of the 365 Day Gratuity Challenge.
8/15/16, Monday.

Some days I have to search for things to be grateful for. Today’s search was brought to you by Pinterest.

Last week I was at my worst. It’s not the first time; I’m sure it won’t be the last. But I can handle it. I’m grateful I’m a strong person.

Last week, I blogged about hope turning out to be evil for me. I stay hopeful because I believe things will get better. I still have that inkling of hope to get what I truly wish for even if it has been many years of being without the very thing I’ve wished for.

Well that spiraled fast off target. I have hope. I believe in the universe…even when the universe stops believing in me. I am grateful to have hope.

I’m gonna get a little selfish and say I’m grateful for air conditioning. LOL.

I’m grateful for family and my husband.

Day 47, 8/16/16, Tuesday.
I’ll be grateful when I pass with good results.

I can’t think if how my day went. I do know it’s been a long day and I am grateful for sleep.


Day 48 of the 365 Day Gratitude Challenge.
It’s hard sometimes to live with an attitude of gratitude. The universe will test you every way imaginable. The only thing you can do is force a fake smile and lie by telling yourself you are happy until that feeling becomes real.

Problems are never permanent. They either go away or you learn to live with them.

Today is my anniversary. I am grateful I have someone who can handle me, and loves me very much…I can be quite the hot mess hahahahahaha.

I’m slowly learning to have an attitude of gratitude.

Day 49 of the 365 Day Gratitude Challenge.
I know that even when I’m sick on a day like today, I can rely on makeup to make me look like I can actually enter into the human race.

I took a selfie earlier and while my makeup is spot on, something was off. I realized I look like a doll with zero personality because I forgot to put eyeliner on.

Today I realize how grateful I am for the invention of makeup. I cannot survive being face naked.

Today’s challenge is brought to you by foundation, mascara, and eyeliner.


Day 50 of the 365 Day Gratitude Challenge.
I can’t believe it’s been 50 days since I’ve started this!

I’m grateful I’m still doing the gratuity challenge. It’s especially tough on depressing days. I haven’t gotten rid of my blues just yet, but I will be on my way soon. I just need someone to tell me to get up…say let’s go for a walk or a jog or something. I know I’ll feel better once I have steady hours and shake this cold off…whatever this thing is I have.

I’m grateful for my friend, Tiki. Without her, I might not have done these challenges for so long. Thank you for being an inspiration!

Day 51 of the 365 Day Gratitude Challenge!
I met Jennifer in the summer of 1986…Yes, that was 30 years ago. I was 8 and she was 7. This picture was taken on my parents’ wedding day 7/4/87. I was nine and she was 8 in this picture.

I can remember how I didn’t even want a picture with Jennifer as I was so jealous of how pretty and confident she was. Even back then, she was so grown up. Far more grown up than I’ll ever be.

We had a lot of hardships together, I think that’s what bonded us. But then as we got older, we parted ways. I moved to Florida, and she was still in Brooklyn, trying to claw her way out of there. I had no idea.

Today I caught word that Jennifer took her own life. She just turned 38 on the 4th of August. I had always thought of ourselves like the characters in the movie Beaches. She was more Barbara Hershey, and I was more Bette Midler.

I am grateful Jennifer came into my life. She taught me how to be more courageous and to not care so much as to what other people thought. She was the toughest person I knew!

I don’t really know much about her adult life, other than what she had told me, because we only got back into contact with each other again 5 years ago…And by then, I was busy taking care of my family.

RIP Jennifer May Poole (Aspromonte). I will always be grateful you were a part of my life…even if it was only for a little bit.

Never Lost

Diana J's Random World

Written by ©Diana Jillian 10/22/11

I wondered about you
And I wandered for you
But you were out of reach

I never understood why
Until today approached
Leaving me uneasy

You could have wandered too
But you didn’t
Because the past was dead for you

The past keeps living for me
Despite my trying to end it
I just want to forget it all

Too many memories
Unwanted feelings
Anxiety lingers

What could have been?
Had I ran a different path
And avoided you completely

How I wish I did
How I wish I did

Then I wouldn’t be looking
And finally have found
What was never lost to begin with

Never lost to begin with

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The Like Button

I usually hit the like button to acknowledge someone’s post.  This applies to all the websites I’ve joined.  I notice I get followers…or more like stalkers?  I don’t really know.

It seems like they’re reading this through the newsfeed, but that’s about it….Or is this called a Reader here?  I don’t even know anymore.

Maybe I should become a hipster too and not show my acknowledgement.  It seems like showing acknowledgement makes you a stalker and/or that you wear your heart on your sleeve?  I don’t really know how this popularity thing works.  I’ve never been popular.  I’ve always just marched to the beat of my own drum….And no, I’m not Missy.